You're at the park with your family and there are some teenagers across the way. You see one of them all of a sudden kick over a garbage can and junk flies all over the ground. You wait a moment thinking they will pick it up but does nothing. What would you do?
Me being a rule follower got up and approached the teens. I told them please don't disrespect our park. I let them know we had waited a long time for this park to be here and if we disrespect it...it will go to trash. So, I try to make eye contact with the girl that did it and asked her to please pick it up. She wouldn't budge. She gave me some lame excuse it was too heavy to pick up so I told her I would help her. Then she said I don't want to touch that crap. Well, then you shouldn't have kicked it over in the first place. The teens started making comments at me(I won't even repeat what they were saying) and I told them if they show this much disrespect to their mother I feel so sad for her. I looked up and saw the obnoxious kid that was yelling at his brothers and sister the whole time we were there and he was recording me on his phone. I said, go ahead and put this on youtube so everyone can see how disrespectful you've been. I asked whatever happened to respecting your elders. I think they misunderstood the English I was using because while I was walking away one of the kids said you are so Mormon and they made a comment about me being their Mom and that they didn't need one in the park. Great, disrespectful and uneducated. Elder is used to refer to someone whose age is older than you. Then they proceeded to say anything they could about Mormons and attacking me as a mother. All the snarky comments they were making really didn't matter until they attacked my religion and me being a mother. It takes a lot to make me cry but you don't attack the two things that are important in my life. I didn't want to give them the satisfaction of seeing me upset so I walked away and waited until I got home. They didn't even know me. I have lived all over the place and have NEVER had my religion made fun of, ridiculed or attacked. Why then is Utah the first place? I know I shouldn't let those punk teenagers get to me but it hurt. I have never in my life been so disrespected by someone younger than me. I couldn't just stand by and let someone deface the park that I bring my children to. What would you have done?? Do you just turn a blind eye or do you take a stand? After the altercation was all over the obnoxious kid proceeded to video tape my family and I the whole time. I'll probably be the witchy woman in the park youtube sensation. They were making comments about me the whole time and Matt gave them a "hey" to lay off my wife. We couldn't say much because he was recording us the whole time we were there. Talk about invasion of privacy. In fact after we got the kids home, Matt went back down to the park. He wanted to see where the video kid lived so he could talk to their parents. Unfortunately, usually when you get kids that are like that the parents haven't taught them the principle of respect. What has happened to our society where respect is non-existent? This experience upset me so much. You know these kind of things you play over and over in your head and when I got home I realized I knew one of the girls who was the older sister of one of Maryn's classmates. At least I remember her saying that she didn't want to be around those guys anymore. Still not speaking up is just as bad as participating. I am not one for confrontation so for me to have to endure this brought up a lot of old feelings of when I was a kid. I was always the one that stood up for people that no one else would dare because it would be social suicide. I had to put up with this as a kid I don't need this as an adult.
So, Matt just got back and found the kid near a group of people near a house and asked if his parents were there. When the kid saw Matt his face went white and he booked it out of there. Come to find out they knew the kid and they said good luck trying to talk to his Dad, which we figured was the case. Turns out Matt talked to his Scout Leader. Matt didn't want to cause trouble but the Scout Leader said he would talk to him. If there is anything that I can teach my kids is to be good people and respectful.
5 Special Comments:
I am sorry Deb! I would have done the same thing, except I probably wouldn't have been able to hold back the tears.
I stopped taking my kids to that park for this very reason. Not only were the teens rude to me but they were rude to my kids. Telling them they were to little to go down the slide or making fun of them. It is sad that teens feel the need to pick on little kids. It is also sad that they feel the need to talk to you in that way. Luckily the few timjes i have confronted them all i have gotten was eye rolls and walking away. It makes you wonder if there parents are even around to teach them that what they say is wrong.
I don't have your bravery. Good for you! I'm sorry they were so disrespectful.
I'm noticing a trend all around where parents aren't teaching respect and other basic values. We had a situation at a ward party where the parents either let their kids run wild with no supervision OR they used the table decorations to entertain their kids. The excuse was that "the kids would play with them anyway so we thought it would be ok to give it to them" and "The things were only plastic toys from the dollar store so we didn't think it mattered." The fact is that they belonged to someone else! It isn't yours to allow your children to play with and break! I don't know how to teach our younger parents that distinction.
I am sorry you had to deal with those kids. Kids know that adults have very little authority in this world. Schools only perpetuate the problem. This behavior is common for me as a high school teacher - every day. And there is little to zero back up from admin. We are told to "ignore it". Unless they are physically harming or threatening to harm, they are just teenagers. Honestly, I would not have said a word to them. I would have just picked up the trash. I admire you for speaking up - I would have thought the worst of them from the beginning and not have wasted my breath. The only kids I talk to (outside of school) are the ones doing something right. The others, sadly, I ignore. It's a sad state of this world, isn't it?
That sounds awful Deb! It reminds me of the kids a the park the other day. We were there getting free lunches and after they sat down they started throwing their food everywhere! I told them to pick it all up and that they wouldn't do free lunches in the park if they wasted the food and littered everywhere. I have no problem speaking up and you did the right thing. I just think "if my kids were doing crap like that, I would want another adult to tell them to stop" The only other thing I would have done in that situation is pulled out my phone, taken pictures of them and threatened to call the police. I know it sounds harsh, but I have made 911 calls before on teens. (Once they were trying to pull out our street sign!) But usually the threat to call the police sends them away.
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